Takes and trash talk from both ALL sides of the NHL's most obscure PATHETIC* rivalry

* Thanks, Kevin Lowe!

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

It's About Time

You know when you have a good joke that you tell someone, but they didn't really hear you or they didn't get it, and then you try to explain it to them but it wasn't really that great and they just kinda say, "Oh... good one," and then you wished you'd never said anything at all? This is one of those. I wanted to put it up yesterday, but I thought you guys would talk about Anaheim so I stayed out of the way. Then I waited today out of deference for San Jose. Now it's old news and none of you probably care anyway, but dammit, I want to talk about this:

Bill Simmons' hockey post from Monday demonstrates why I wish he'd never write about hockey. It's full of all the usual stupid stuff [expansion killed hockey, the sport used to be blue-collar (there's always a vague slam on Europeans in this)], but it basically boils down to this:

"I used to like hockey because the Bruins were GOOD.

"Then I stopped liking hockey because the Bruins were BAD.

"Now I like the Bruins because they are GOOD AGAIN."

The part that bothers me the most about Bill Simmons is that he constantly talks about how much sports (and teams) mean to him, but you know it's all bullshit. He loved the Bruins that he cried so hard he got a bloody nose, but then he has no qualms about tossing them aside once they hit incompetence? He brags about how he has been to every Celtics game this season, but last year he wrote about how he's starting to fall for the Clippers (who just so happened to be better than the Celtics last season)? I guess he really is the voice of the fan; after all, most fans are complete fucking idiots.

Oh, and Boston sucks.

(Of course, I waited to post this and then Eric McErlain beat me to it over at The Fanhouse. Dammit.)


jamestobrien said...

I'd be a liar if I denied how much Bill Simmons influenced my writing and still does.

But it seems like having a baby and increased Boston success has been the perfect storm to make Bill Simmons occasionally insufferable.

Still, I don't think I'll ever hate him as much as the folks as Deadspin do.

RudyKelly said...

Don't get me wrong, I like Bill Simmons... as long as he's not writing about things I know about. Writing about basketball or football? Love it. Writing about baseball or hockey? He sucks.

Bryan said...

The thing about Bill Simmons is he is a total homer. Not that every fan isn't somewhat. But come on give me a break. Garnet for basketball MVP? Boston this Boston that.

And as someone who knows about football, I can tell you he doesn't know very much about football. He is only good for pop culture references to sports and thats it. Like the Brad Richards is a $5 dollar shake is very Bill Simmonsesque. It makes for entertaining writing, but Bill Simmons is a moron when it comes down to actual substantive material.

In general, most of the ESPN writers are morons. Don't get me started on Burnside and Cox, who said that Nabokov needs to have another good year before he can win the Vezina.