I Forgot an Alternate Definition for "Fuck"

Fuck- when your best defenseman injures his shoulder and misses 3 months. FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK FUCK

The Kings picked up Kyle Quincey from the Detroit Red Wings to take Johnson's spot. He's young (23) and played in the AHL last season. I don't know what to think of him; he had a ton of penalty minutes last season and was waived to make room for Dorian Grey Chris Chelios. I think he could potentially be a bottom-pairing defenseman in the NHL so I imagine the Kings will give him some time to prove himself in the NHL. I think the Kings are going to need to move someone to make room for a new contract though.

This is catastrophic for the Kings. The Kings are now even worse on defense and there's not much they can do about it. Johnson was expected to play ~25 minutes a game and in all situations. It'll be interesting to see how the Kings respond to this. I know how I'm going to respond to this:

Settle Down, Kevin Lowe

Hey, Brian Burke and Kevin Lowe want to eat each other, go to town, I don't care. But this quote pissed me the fuck off:

"Lastly, he's in a pathetic hockey market where they can't get on any page of the newspaper let alone the front page of the sports, so any of this stuff carries on."

I'll list the problems with this statement is list form because it's easy:

1) Anaheim is a good hockey market right now. They were 15th in attendance and 6th in capacity last season. Just because they have a shitty, outdated arena doesn't mean they're a bad hockey market.

2) What newspaper? The LA Times? The OC Register? The Long Beach Press-Telegram? I know the Ducks get twice the coverage the Kings do in the Times, so he can't be talking about it. And the Register... well, I don't get the Register because I don't eat my young but I'm sure they cover the Ducks extensively. And really, do Canadian papers put sports news on the cover of their newspapers? I would probably cancel any subscription I had to a newspaper if they made me turn the page to get the latest body count in Iraq because some Finnish guy signed with my favorite team.

3) Really, man? This is the route you wanna go? Your franchise spent the '90s hanging by a thread and now you want to go around judging other teams? You're the one team in Canada that should have our back, man, because you know what it's like to have people judge you. Don't give into that easy belief that because someone made you feel inferior you have to turn around and judge someone else. Look, Lowe, I know you probably don't respect Burke because he went to college and you played with Wayne Gretzky, but don't resort to junior high bullshit. Burke's a blowhard and a jackass, but he's not an idiot. He made an argument, now defend yourself. You have an argument: you only did what was best for the Oilers and it's not your fault the Flyers panicked and signed Mike Richards to a 5-year deal at $5.75 per. Why don't you say that? Trying to paint Burke as a shitty GM is stupid and you know better.


And trying to tar anywhere in California as a shitty hockey market is fucking bullshit and you damn well know it.

Drinky post: Sometimes old cartoons say it the best

Well, now I've seen the disaster which is the postseason Ducks of '08, and I can't hide behind the wall of denial any longer. This team is fucked.

In a perverse way, here's how I'd approach G3 if I were Randy Carlyle: healthy scratch Teemu Selanne.
"But Sleek, why Selanne? Wasn't he the best Duck on the ice tonight?"

Indeed he was, by a huge margin. In fact, Teemu really should be the one Duck not in danger of being scratched after tonight's performance. It seemed that Selanne was the only Duck who realized the inherent value of generating a shot on net, and shockingly, Teemu was the Ducks' best backchecker in several instances, too (a sure sign your team is in trouble? Selanne is your best defender). So why scratch Teemu?

To send the rest of the team a message. This team will not win if it keeps trying to play "Teemu Selanne plus 19 passenger" hockey. And as it's not feasible to scratch 19 passengers, the best hope is to scratch the one effective player and hope the rest of the team wakes up. If they don't, this team is done, no matter how awesome a scratched Selanne would have played.

Somebody else needs to shoot the puck with Selanne's intensity. And somebody else needs to backcheck with his tenacity. If nobody's going to do it, I sure hope Selanne can sign himself with a contender next year. He definitely deserves better.

3 Ways to Help the Kings

You are heartless if this does not make you laugh. That little guy is so serious!

Does that make you feel better? Okay, let's go...

1) Have Set Lines. For fuck's sake, please have set lines. Tonight the Kings had Armstrong, Frolov and Ivanans out there for an extended period of time. I mean... there's a difference between switching things up and just having no fucking idea what you're doing. You know what else would confuse the other team? Making the Kings play without sticks. Send them out there with shoes on, the Red Wings wouldn't know what the fuck. This team has 5 new faces on offense; put them on a line and let them get comfortable with one another. If I had a say, I'd prefer:

Nagy-Kopitar-Brown
Frolov-Armstrong-Cammy
Calder-Handzus-O'Sully
Thornton-Zeiler-Ivanans

But hey, I'm not picky. Put Ivanans with Frolov, I don't care. Just please, for the love of God, let them build some fucking chemistry.

2) Play the Right Defensemen. I don't know what the hell is going on with our defensive corps, but something's wrong. To figure out what the deal is, let's look at the Kings' defense in terms of time on ice as compared to the defense of the Ducks last year (what?):


Lubo: 22:07 _____________________Nieds: 27:30
Blake: 23:17_____________________Captain Elbows: 27:05
Stuart: 23:06____________________Beauchemin: 25:28
Johnson: 20:01___________________O'Donnell: 19:55
Preissing: 16:01___________________Huskins: 14:04
Modry: 15:21_____________________DiPenta: 12:09

Do you see the problem? The Kings are playing their best defensemen far too little. You know it's right; how many times have you seen Modry and Johnson out there in a crucial situation? I think the Kings need to switch things up, putting Lubo with Stuart and Blake with Preissing. I'm all for Jack Johnson's development, but he does not need to be out there for 20 minutes a game.

3) Get Some God Damn Balls. Seriously, you guys are playing like you don't give a rat's ass whether you win or lose. I've yet to see a consistent 60-minute effort from any person on the Kings roster. I know you get paid whether you win or not, but you're killing me. I'm... I'm not eating right. I'm not sleeping well. I'm being asked to leave places because of my continuous shouts of, "Fucking Brownie!" (Seriously, my boss thinks I'm a racist.) I don't care if you win the next game against Minnesota (I would just be disappointed if I did) but I want it to look like you care. Kick Boogaard's ass, crunch Demitra, make it seem like you actually want to win. That's all I ask. I'm going to start writing like the Unabomber if you keep this up.

Drinky Post—wherein I swear a lot tonight and regret a lot tomorrow

stolen from Bizarro

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

Easily the worst game I have attended at the Pond / Honda Center in my lifetime, though I will note that I was pretty assured of the outcome by the end of the 1st period (Det 2, Ana 0). I was pretty sure it would unravel after that. Case in point—me and a guy from the 3rd deck were the two guys outside having a cigarette when that 5-minute major got called in the 2nd.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

I’m not so much upset at the final score; as I said, it was decided early. But I am really upset at the Ducks for not putting their bodies in Hasek’s crease for the last 30 minutes, when the game was out of reach. I’ll tell you what fans in my section were hearing: “If you’re not running Hasek, you’re not trying!”

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

I’m pretty glad, actually, that it was a 5-0 final. Had we lost 2-1, maybe there would have been no urgency for a G4 adjustment.

There’s probably a benefit to me being at the game as opposed to watching it on TV. Because of latecomers and my own spotty attendance, I only got to see the 2nd and 4th goals.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

I’ll tell you what was the biggest realization of the night: I might not really hate the Red Wings as much as I hate the fucking Red Wing fans. You want to know why “Hockeytown” is being harassed for its attendance (pricing) issues? Look no further than your asshole fans, who’ve been citing attendance numbers to discredit our franchise for years!

In all seriousness, you might be the best, most polite, quaintest Red Wing fan in the universe, but know this. You come from easily the worst fanbase in the western conference, from a tolerability standpoint. I won’t go into specifics about tonight, but know that at the end of the game I shook a guy’s hand for being a Wings fan and not an asshole.

And I had to go two sections over to find him.

FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK! FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

Well, in the end it is only one game. Sure it’s a message-sender, but there’s still room to respond. Ducks have got to get their shit together, that’s for sure.

But FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!

Drinky Math: How do you spell "Cheechoo?"

Well, I spell it like this:


That guy only knows two kinds of streaks, Cold or Hot, and not much in between. 4 goals in 2 games against the Ducks, which was preceded by a seven game goalless streak, that followed a 5 goals in 7 game stretch, that followed a 1 goal in 9 game slump, and well, you get the picture.

Well, I got curious about one thing, and here's what I found out:

Fuckin' Cheechoo has been murdering his BoC brothers since the lockout.

• C/HeeC/Hoo vs. Anaheim, 15 goals in 12 games (5 multi-goal games, 1.25 g/gm, Ay carumba hot!)


• C/HeeC/Hoo vs. Los Angeles, 11 goals in 13 games (4 multi-goal games, 0.85 g/gm, still a lot of hot!)


• C/HeeC/Hoo vs. non-California, just 54 goals in 117 games (8 multi-goal games, 0.46 g/gm, lotsa cold there). The most he has scored against any other team is 6, despite the fact that three non-CA teams have had more games against the Sharks than either the Kings or Ducks.

Since the lockout, roughly one-third of Cheechoo's goals and more than one-half of his multi-goal games have come against the BoC teams.

That's fucking prejudice, man.


[Oh yeah, picture above stolen from PJ's picture pages. Awesome stuff.]

Drinky post—I’m confused; am I rooting for the best team in the league or the 2nd-worst?

(Author’s note: Thanks, Philadelphia. You’ve pretty much got that “worst” spot locked up.)

(Author’s note: the pictorial tragedy to the left was the best graphical representation I could find of the Anaheim season of-late.)

(Author’s note: Warning—I am going to try to do this post without any numbers—sorry, JavaGeek and mudcrutch. Just me, this goddamn keaybord, and the reader.)

I’ve written at length now about the on-ice statistics as it relates to the Ducks (scroll down, I'm still on Blogger 1.0), and don’t get me wrong, there’s pretty powerful stuff to be learned in reading these numbers. But seldom have I taken pause and told the plight about the fragile emotional state of one (drunk) Sleek, and how the rollercoaster Ducks have affected his (drunk and online) soul.

Now if you were to classify me as a hockey fan, you might describe me as “stoic”. If you were a bit more astute, you’d describe me as “drunk enough that he’s not fully aware of the game outcome, thus he appears to be very stoic.” And while both are pretty valid, the truth is these Ducks have forced me into a certain state of detachment—for sure these Ducks were not as good as when they started (best team ever?); for sure they are not as bad as the team I’ve been watching since Christmas (worst team ever?). Yet somewhere in this vast in-between lies the truth.

There’s a secret part of me that’s not unhappy about the recent downfall—most notably the “blogger” in me. You see, when I set out on this cover-the-Ducks thing last spring, I had a sort of “underdog voice”, something along the lines of “Hey, stop disrespecting the Ducks! We’re a legitimate team with legitimate fans too!” Something like the Acid Queen, I suppose, I 'll kick your ass for coming from a legitimate hockey market.

But it was also an awkward teenage moment for the (Mighty) Ducks; at one moment I am telling the world to “watch out for these upstart Mighty Ducks” (loosely interpreted from my first post), and next thing I know it, fuck! We’re cup favorites?! The disrespect was suddenly over?!

I didn’t really know how to write from that Red-Wing-ish, top-of-the-league perspective, where most every night you’re expected to win, and sure enough, you do. In fact, I’m still not sure what I should be posting when everything goes your way.

But when things go to shit, hey the “blogger voice” in me kicks in, and I can criticize anyone, from Teemu to Bettman to the cute couple sitting in front of me at the fucking game.

So yeah, this season has certainly been weird. The front-end went so well that I lost interest in any particular game (that I wasn’t at), and now the accumulated point cushion has allowed that I don’t care about any particular outcome, so long as I can point to injuries as a contributing factor to any loss. I’ve spent most of this season pretty indifferent to what happened on any given night.

Throughout the losing, though, I haven’t really lost any hope on this year’s Ducks, as injury timetables still show us being a complete kick-ass roster by the time playoffs roll around. But if there’s one benefit to all this losing (and there’s probably only just this one), I now have revitalized interest in how this season, game-by-game, turns out.

Like I said in an earlier post, we’re going to be neck-and-neck with the Sharks for the Pacific lead, and within reach of the Preds or Wings for a 4-team fight for the top spot. Should be a blast.

(this time in earnest) GO DUCKS!

(Author’s note: being pretty drunk, can I put in another plug for my brother’s frickin’ album? The more I listen to it the more I like it. Go ahead and buy one—none of the proceeds go to Pronger.)

(Author’s note: I'm off for a bit more misery-drinking. I’m just going to post this thing and see what sticks in the morning.)

My drunk roommate has a request...

Per his request:

Complete this sentence...


Hey Parros! __________ called and it/he wants its/his _________ back!!!

OK, I'm drunky.

Was it really 5-0 Ducks?

p.s. What a tease that Teemu is. I ask for 500 goals, and he gets me to 499?

Drinky Post--Ducks get hit by train wreck, Sleek rants

Nothing gets you drinking like giving up 7 goals to the Flyers (on 16 shots? Wow.). Random thoughts (warning: a long, directionless, Red Label-inspired post):

Anyone wanna trade for George Parros? That guy’s a human zamboni, using his jersey to slide-sweep the ice. Jeez, Burke. I’m not so sure. Todd Fedoruk was a great fighter and could even contribute in his minutes (the easy ice time, with Getzlaf and Perry). Shawn Thornton maybe wasn’t that great a fighter, but he did really well in the Fedoruk minutes. Parros? I dunno. He’s got the balance of a drunk infant giraffe. A real downgrade.

------------------------------
Yeah, by the numbers it looks pretty stunning that bottomfeeders Ottawa and Philadelphia would shock world-beaters Buffalo and Anaheim, but really, these teams were due. Mudcrutch makes the point pretty well, and JavaGeek does a good job with the Senators specifically. Sucks to say, but the Sens and Flyers aren’t as bad as they were letting on, just as the Sabres and Ducks aren’t as good as they were letting on.
------------------------------
Stats rant: John Kreisler, an NHL.com columnist (the “numbers” guy) had a note on the Flyers (emphasis mine)

The Flyers have a league-low 30 goals (including one in a shootout), though it’s not for a lack of trying. They’ve out-shot their opponents in 12 of their 15 games -- including the last eight, in which they are 2-6-0.

When I look at the NHL standings, why does a shootout win/loss count as a statistical goal? Isn’t that already reflected in the W or O column? I mean, I don’t care particularly about the counting method, but when you look at player stats, nobody gets credit for scoring a goal or a game-winning goal. A winning goalie does not get a save, nor a losing goalie a goal-against. It is, in fact, a phantom goal. If you want to put a shootout win in the goals column, then award a damn goal, dumbass league.
------------------------------
While I’m on the topic of numbers, here’s another thought. I’m really into the mathy stuff being done around the blogosphere, ranging from ice time analysis to shot chart analysis (both on the ice and on the net). More and more, people like us are getting a better and better handle on gathering the data elements of hockey and learning how to read them (through no help of the NHL, mind you). There’s no perfect metric to this sport, of course, but I think the first strides made in data analysis won’t have to be perfect to be effective. It’s just that raw a game.
At any rate, I would humbly like to add one thing to JavaGeek’s excellent data wish list. For every goal scored, I think there should be some sort of data collected about why the goal was scored. Was there a screen? Was it a breakaway? Did the puck deflect? Was the goalie caught in a 2-on-1? Was it just a perfect shot? This it seems to me is just as important as where on the ice the puck was shot or where on the net it was aimed.
We know fundamentally that understanding winning means understanding scoring, both from a productive sense and a preventive sense. I am really in favor of data collection about shot modeling, but I think there should be better differentiation about which goals to model around. My two cents, any way.
------------------------------
Um, I have slammed Hockey News in the past, but there’s two pieces in the issue I just picked up of some interest (I don't have a link). One is about shootouts, and really breaks down where on the net shooters aimed (hint: glove-side high). The other is about declines in attendance, and writer Ken Campbell, I think, kicks some real ass.

Saskin, on the other hand, tells me he isn't the least bit concerned, even though the players' pay checks are directly tied into how many fans they attract. Saskin reasons enough teams raised ticket prices to make up for the revenue shortfall and he has every confidence when final receipts are tallied, the league will exceed the $2.1 billion in revenue it made last year... wasn't the lockout and cost certainty supposed to be in large part about maintaining affordable ticket prices?... Remind me again exactly why it was we missed a full season of hockey if a significant number of teams can paper the house and still report enough in revenues to give the players well over a billion dollars in salary.

------------------------------
As a conclusion to this directionless drinky post, I would like to throw one more idea out there. If the NHL is really serious about the 'watchability' of hockey (which I don't think is measured in goals, by the way), one area I think it might want to take a look at is at the blue line. So hard to penetrate, so easy to defend! Somehow if the offsides rule was more 'relaxed', I think, there would be better flow to games and more chances. Here's three ideas, going conservative-to-radical:

1) Fatten the blue line. Allow a forward to break in earlier when the puck touches blue.
2) Personal tag-up on-sides. Right now if one player is offsides, everyone has to tag up. In this version, only that one player needs to tag up while others can continue "offsides".
3) Allow one forward to be offside. This is really radical, but a whistle would only be blown if two players were offside.

The real idea, I think, is to make things harder to defend. To make scoring chances easier to come by (or at least, more frequent). To get tripped up a little bit less by the stickiness of the neutral zone. At the very least, changing the blueline would have to change the way the game was defended, which at this point is almost a game of "clear the zone".
------------------------------
OK, I'm not even sure if this all makes sense, but Drinky Sleek is putting a stop to this (the typing, not the drinking). Good luck, everyone! Rational posts start tomorrow!

Drinky post: The Lockout

(Author’s note: I would do more drinky posts, but my alcohol-intake is highly correlated with the NHL schedule. In the meantime, I’ve been meaning to post something about the lockout for a while, but haven’t quite been get the words together. Solution? Johnny Walker and a blank screen. I am, in a way, re-writing a lot of this.)

A lot of hockey blog posts I read lately start with something like “Well, since nothing happened AGAIN, here’s something to pass the time.” Now I appreciate web nonsense and general impatience as much as the next guy, but how the heck did we get so oblivious? Are we seriously forgetting that we just went through a bloody lockout? A year of NHL cancelled to us?

(Now I don’t know how things were in other parts of the NHL-starved world, but here in L.A. that meant we were cut off. Maybe twice a month there would be a rerun NCAA hockey game that we’d catch on the DVR, but whatever hockey was going on during the lockout year, it wasn’t being televised in Southern California.)

And as much as the lockout was a struggle between owners and players, really it was a struggle between professional sports and paying fans. A motherfucking year off. Can you imagine it?

Some blame the players for being such greedy bastards and failing to comply with the owners’ reported financial needs. Others blame the owners for being such greedy bastards and trying to legislate their own stupidity. And yes, all that is fair. Everyone involved was a greedy bastard and deserves a winter in hell.

But what about us, the fans? Where is our share of the responsibility?

When I’m at a restaurant, and at the table next to me there are children making a ruckus, I generally don’t hold a grudge against the kids themselves; rather I save my icy stares for the negligent parent(s) who allow(s) their offspring to behave in such a rude and distasteful manner. The fact that these kids need to be whacked isn’t any fault either child (“…but he started it!”); rather the fault lies with the parent/guardian that couldn’t properly discipline their infant monsters.

Well, folks, I am that negligent parent. I let my league take a whole motherfucking year off to settle some off-ice dispute, and instead of disciplining that league, I coddled these brats. Like a chain smoker on an international flight, I itched so bad for hockey that I ran back to the turnstiles, continued to feed this league my money, and half-pretended this whole thing was behind us.

The NHL (and all its self-promoting hoo-ha) tell us that attendance is up to record numbers. Hockey fans like me apparently are pitifully forgiving and painfully obedient. We love the NHL, even when it decides it didn’t love us last year.

But what, really, have we taught the league and its players, who notoriously would rather listen to our wallets than our blogs? That it is OK to misbehave and sit at a negotiating table for a year and a half while we sit around and (insert lockout pastime here)?!!

Now I don’t want to be a doom-and-gloomer (that’s my hero Tom B.!), but there are signs already that neither side quite got what they were bargaining for in this new CBA. So what happens when it expires? What happens when new owners and new players decide on a new agreement to meet new expectations?

Have we taught these stupid kids anything?

“Hey, take a year off, you two. Have a jerkfest with your lawyers and split up your pie; we’ll be here when you get back.”

You know, I really hope it works out for the NHL. I hope they can make tons of money and each and every greedy bastard can go home happy. But lately I'm worried...

I love the sport but not the business, and the year the league misbehaved and prioritized business over sport, I was negligent in my punishment. I, the NHL's lenient parent, gave the league its money (if not more!) and my precious wallet pretended the whole thing never happened.

Hopefully it won’t come to this again, dumbshits. Make your damn deal next time and play your hockey. No more motherfucking years off.

Love,

Sleekster

(Next drinky post: Why I hate new rules!)

Doug Wilson Drinking Game!

My friend Kyle and I have put together the definitive list of Doug Wilson-isms. Have a drink any time you hear one of these phrases:

-Every day is a trade deadline. (do a shot)

-We believe in our players. (have a beer)

-We tried to sign Scott Niedermayer. (do two shots)

-Owen Nolan has given a lot of blood, sweat, and tears for this franchise. (have a beer)

-I will do anything to make this team better. (have a cocktail)

-It's a good problem to have. (pound a beer)

-We have the best coaching staff in the world. (have a cocktail)

-Matt Carle... (any sort of fawning upon Matt Carle -- have a beer)

-Reward excellence. (have a sip of your favorite drink)

-Makes some comment about filling holes from within. (do three shots)

Update!
-After December 1st (Joe Thornton trade), we were one of the best teams/best power plays/most winning teams in the league. (do two shots)

-Veteran leadership is overrated. (do a sake bomb)

"I didn't say Ducks in seven; I said Ducks in '07!!!"

Oh man, this was coming. I knew it when we had only a one-goal lead in the first, and when we trailed after two. IN EV IT A BLE.

Read it here for the last time: CONGRATULATIONS OIL. AND GOOD LUCK.

Now for the gripe (only minor this time): We did not deserve the win, but it SUCKS that the game winning goal came on a too-many-men-penalty when the player in question LEAPT INTO ANOTHER GUY'S LAP to avoid the call. It was the "essence" of not getting called, but it was made a penalty nonetheless.

AT ANY RATE, we couldn't get it done, which is not that surprising given the deficit we were trying to come back from.

I cannot be upset with these Ducks for losing in the conference finals. Period. In so many ways, they did not deserve to be there in the first place. Still, the opportunity was there, and we couldn't get it done.

More to come, I'm sure. Note that Ruslan or Vitaly never made it to the penalty box, and apparently Dustin Penner cannot read Russian, even after three tries!!!

Aah, who cares? More drinking. Afterthoughts later.

[Edit: Note that the joke in the headline has worked for the Lakers, Clippers, and Ducks this year, but won't work for another century. Use it now while you still can!]

The Ducky Drunky Post

(Author's note: because I have been drinking a lot, I reserve the right to delete this post later)

(Author's note: because I have been drinking a lot, all I will do in this post is gripe)

GRIPE #1: I have since found out that the Hemsky goal was "legit", but when I was at the game, sitting at the wrong end of the ice, I was under the impression that some Oiler ran into Breezy on the goal. In fact, my whole end of the arena was outraged at this goal. Why the f uc k will they show me meaningless replays throughout the whole game, but never show me a god damn replay of the game winning goal?! In the end, it was nice enough, but I couldn't know that until I got to a friend's house to watch the replay. Stupid animatron decided to show us some movie clips instead. GRRRRRRRR.

GRIPE #2: Stupid Anaheimers!!! The final score was Fans 3, Ushers 0, mainly starring the guy two rows behind me, who in the end griped that me and my kid bro decided to (gasp) stand up for the last minute of the game. "Whatsamatter? You miss the empty netter?"

GRIPE #3: (deleted for nonsense) (it had something to do with traffic)

GRIPE #4: My kid bro is what, 3 months from being 21? I had to buy two beers to drink one. Still, I seem to have a lot of commemorative cups at the end of the day.

GRIPE #5: Mr. Roloson, let me buy you a good roll of duct tape and STICK YOUR GODDAMN MASK TO YOUR GODDAMN HEAD. Doesn't the NHL or NHLPA have to do something in the name of 'protection'? You drop your mask twice in two games and guess what? YOU GET A NEW MASK.

All said, it might have been a good game, but I was not glad to be there. Had there been no uniforms, I might have been at a Flames game.

(Author's note: I will fix this post later, upon recovery)

(Author's note: we did cheer for o canada, that's something)