Takes and trash talk from both ALL sides of the NHL's most obscure PATHETIC* rivalry

* Thanks, Kevin Lowe!

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

The Chances of Oscar Moller and Wayne Simmonds

One interesting aspect of this whole Patrick O'Sullivan holdout thing is that it opens up one more spot on the roster for a little while. If O'Sullivan were to wait another couple weeks to sign, he'd probably miss the first few games while he got in game shape. In the meantime, prospects Oscar Moller and Wayne Simmonds have impressed in training camp, leading some to wonder if they can earn a spot. In reality, it was extremely unlikely they were going to beat out someone like Ted Purcell or Kyle Calder, but with O'Sullivan gone they may have a chance to stay up and get in a few games.

You need to clear that puck or we'll all gonna die!

Oscar Moller is the more skilled of the two and has more hockey sense; though small, Moller is pretty tenacious and works well in the corners. Also, he looks like Captain America from Generation Kill. Last night Moller scored a goal and 2 assists in only 12 minutes of action. The problem with Moller is that he's a little small and probably couldn't hang for a full NHL season quite yet, but the Kings may decide to keep him up for the 10-game limit before sending him back to Chilliwack of the WHL.

Feel the rhythm/feel the rhyme/get on up/it's ass-kicking time!

Wayne Simmonds, on the other hand, is what my roommate in college would call a CAB (Cool Ass Brother).* Simmonds probably doesn't have the hockey sense to hang in the NHL, but he does not quit and would definitely make an impact for the Kings. Plus, the crowd would fall in love with him in about .4 seconds because he's cool and I'm already in love with him because he looks like the main guy from Cool Runnings. (In my head he's starring in a real life sequel.) He had a goal, a fight, and a game misconduct last night in Kansas City. Simmonds will be headed to Manchester this season to work on his defense and to get bigger, but he could end up staying if the Kings replace O'Sullivan's minutes with a current roster player. I have to admit, I really want to give Simmonds a shot because I think he has earned it.

*I'd stumble over my words and then whisper that he's African-Canadian.

What's that old saying, when someone closes a door they open a window? That doesn't make sense, because why would you close a door and then immediately open a window and what if you have a cat, but it works for the Kings' purposes. The Kings seem to have gotten lucky with Moller and Simmonds and they could use O'Sullivan's holdout as an opportunity to reward them for their hard work.

Also, Jarret Stoll had 3 hooking penalties last night. Uh oh.

12 comments:

Earl Sleek said...

a) I'm kind of surprised, Rudy. I figured that winning two simultaneous preseason games would have you buying playoff tickets. Still, it's an impressive feat.

b) Among my non-BoC whorish activities, I did a Ducks preview for Melt Your Face Off that ran today. It's not the best thing I've ever written, but it's more exciting than my day job.

Earl Sleek said...

Jeez, did all the Kings fans pass out from celebratory drinking last night?

Jordan said...

No, that's for tomorrow night's fantasy draft (I take a shot for every third player I draft).

Ksy92003 said...

Not only did Moller have a goal and two assists against Phoenix last night, but his goal was the game-winning goal. It was a nice poke at a loose puck with pretty much everybody down low in the crease. Moller really impressed me last night, and would be a nice addition to the club should the POS talks fall through.

Anonymous said...

I love lamp, I love chair... I want to see Purcell on the first line next game

RudyKelly said...

Kings fans don't actually read us; I think it's just you and people from Edmonton.

Earl Sleek said...

Uh-oh. Better take Erik Johnson off your fantasy draft lists. He's apparently gone for the season, meaning... Schneider? Maybe?

I love speculation.

RudyKelly said...

Wow, that really sucks, he's awesome.

Black Dog said...

If it makes you feel any better rudy I'm in Toronto but I am an Oilers' fan so ....

In other news, Jarret Stoll truly has sucked since Sami Pahlsson rang his bell. That contract Lombardi gave him? Buddy scored three goals at ES last year and one was into an empty net.

Blame Pahlsson. Blame the Ducks. Blame Earl.

Earl Sleek said...

Blame Earl.

You may as well. I don't think the Kings have been close to good since I started blogging here.

So what does Stoll have on Lombardi anyway? What would Stoll do to get his money, say, if he were in O'Sullivan's shoes, I wonder?

Nut said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Nut said...

I like the idea of these two together with Frolov in a few years. It reminds me of Allison Palffy Deadmarsh (Fro with good puck control, Moller is small and flashy, Simmonds is all character and fucking people up). Its a stretch and and probably will never come to fruition but it still makes me go from 6 to midnight.