Takes and trash talk from both ALL sides of the NHL's most obscure PATHETIC* rivalry

* Thanks, Kevin Lowe!

Friday, February 22, 2008

He's Saying "I Look Like Ellen Degeneres" in Swedish

Early in the first period last night, Derek Armstrong went down with a knee injury. As the collective gasps went up from the Kings bench (not because of Armstrong; someone had spilled a water bottle), Marc Crawford began to despair. Here's an exclusive look at what happened next:

Marc Crawford: Curses! We can't win without Derek Armstrong! Go ahead and pack it up boys, this game's over.

Ted Purcell: (whispering) Hey, Kopy, who the hell is this Armtough guy?

Anze Kopitar: He's the shitty older guy on the team.

Ted Purcell: (confused) You're going to have to be more specific.

Patrick O'Sullivan: Umm, coach, I can play center if you want. I mean, I did play it in Junior and a little bit in the AHL, and a little bit earlier this ye-

Marc Crawford: No, no, no! We can't have you playing center, Peyton! Just let me think...

(silence)

Marc Crawford: Shut up! I got it. Maybe if we put Brian Willsie with Kopitar and Brown, and then- you!

Erik Ersberg: Da?

Marc Crawford: You're my new 2nd line center.

Erik Ersberg: Var det väl eller illa skrivet!

Marc Crawford: Yes, that's it! I put the swede with Frolov, Dave Lewis with Kopitar, Handzus with the popcorn guy, Phil Anschultz with... (unintelligible)

Patrick O'Sullivan: Cammy, Fro, you guys just want to go score 3 goals?

Mike Cammalleri: Sure, he'll probably be going for another 20 minutes.

Alex Frolov (Looking up from Anna Karenina): Yes, stick must touch puck and make red light.

Patrick O'Sullivan: Alright, let's go before Crawford notices.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Best. Recap. Ever!!!

Anonymous said...

Funny funny funny. I think you've captured the madness of Marc Crawford brilliantly.