Takes and trash talk from both ALL sides of the NHL's most obscure PATHETIC* rivalry

* Thanks, Kevin Lowe!

Thursday, February 07, 2008

Ducks Gameday—If you're ever in New York, come see the White House!

Anaheim Ducks (28-22-7, t-5th in west) at New York Rangers (27-23-6, 7th in east)

Well, the Ducks certainly didn't take the easiest route between New York games. Most of the Ducks took a quick trip to Washington, D.C., to meet President Bush (as is customary for cup champs to do). Bush opened his comments with this one-liner:

"Have you noticed a lot of security around here? It's because the Vice President heard there were some Ducks around."
I won't comment on the merit of the joke itself, but allow me to reiterate how good it is that Ottawa didn't win the cup finals; Bush would have had hours of material ("The last time I got together with this many Senators, we passed the Homeland Security Act, yuk yuk").

Below is a photo of the group; note how savvy Bush's Secret Service team is. They kept Chris Pronger's elbows at a maximum distance from the President's head at all times.


Question for Duck-haters: Who is the biggest douchebag in this photo?

Speaking of the President, this week's PuckToon is designed around Super Tuesday's primary elections. I'm pretty sure my political ignorance is evident, but that's the beauty of drawing cartoons: you're already an idiot going into it.

Prediction: I didn't realize this until Battle of New York brought it up, but the Rangers are 0-6-2 against the west this year, outscored 31-16. It seems like the setup for an easy win, but what's really been easy this year? Ducks win a narrow one 4-3. Goals by Pronger, Kunitz, May, and Selanne.

To our Chinese readers: Happy New Year! Go Ducks.

24 comments:

Earl Sleek said...

Hmm, maybe there's no Duck haters who wake up this early in the day...

RudyKelly said...

The answer is always Corey Perry. If the question is, "Who's a bigger douche bag: George W. Bush, Corey Perry, John Mayer, or the reporter guy from Die Hard," the answer is still Corey Perry.

Anonymous said...

So, uh, I guess the traded guys and Penner didn't get to go?

Laura Lee said...

Gung hay fat choy!

Earl Sleek said...

Well, I know Penner's Oilers were playing last night in Edmonton, so he was occupied. As for Andy McDonald, I don't know why he wasn't in attendance (perhaps he wasn't invited). The Blues didn't play yesterday or won't play today.

Anonymous said...

bush by a landslide

Anonymous said...

How about Scott Niedermayer for taking half the year off and handcuffing the tea.....

I'm sorry, I meant, how can he stand right next to a guy who pretty much represents everything he's opposed to and SMILE?

Unless he just stuck a PETA flier on the guy's back - unimpressive.

bdub said...

i really enjoy looking at their faces.

scott looks like he is up to no good whatsoever, probably is peta flyer or g-bush's fly is down.

jiggy - looks like he is posing for a portrait. "Giguère 08 anyone? québec separatist movement suddenly becomes california separatist movement."

how fun. :)

andrew said...

Holy shit, Parros looks like Jason Lee in 'My Name is Earl'. Pornstache rockin' and eyes closed for the picture. Nice!

And I'm with Rudy. Corey Perry is a thousand times more doucherrific than just about anybody ever. Ever.

Earl Sleek said...

Wow. I guess Pronger's finally found a photo he can pose in without being the focal point of hatred. Nice!

kevin said...

Scotty looks more like a guy who is smiling because he managed to sneak into a photo shoot with a bunch of guys who actually look like hockey players and not a geeky nerd.

And notice how much more tan Teemu is than the rest of the players who have been playing and practicing indoors for the past four months.

Kirsten said...

Hmmm, that's a very tough question. I would have answered sooner, but classes and other obligations got in my way of pondering this most important question. I'll get back to you soon.

Could Scott Niedermayer possibly look any nerdier? He looks quite a bit like one of my professors.

Earl Sleek said...

No rush, Kirsten. This photo isn't going anywhere. Being a Wild fan, I'd expect a dilemma -- you may be part of the only fanbase to consider Brad May in this menagerie of evil.

RudyKelly said...

And Earl, good call on that Fanhouse roundtable. I love Ovechkin but Lidstrom has been pretty unreal this season. I think he gets penalized because he has Zetterberg and Datsyuk, but they're not the reason Detroit has given up 13 less goals than anyone else.

Earl Sleek said...

Thanks, Rudy. If anyone's interested in that Hart discussion or its comments, they can be found here.

Kirsten said...

Earl Sleek-I know, and it's making my decision much harder. May, Pronger, or Bush?

Patty (in Dallas) said...

It's really hard to narrow down the douchiest Duck. Is it Niedermayer for wearing a lighter suit than everybody else so we'll all be sure and notice him? And what a smooth skater he is?

Earl Sleek said...

It's really hard to narrow down the douchiest Duck.

I'm sure. Don't forget Bush--he's purposely part of this exercise.

VeryProudofYa said...

Carter should just not fight ever again.

Patty (in Dallas) said...

When you said Duck-haters, I thought you meant Ducks. I'm still gonna say Niedermayer.

bdub said...

and rob looks like hes wondering if he's really related to urcle.

Earl Sleek said...

I only brought up Duck-haters because I figured they'd have more interesting answers. Duck fans would just say "Bush" without batting an eye.

I'm really stunned nobody's said Pronger. What a popular guy!

Kirsten said...

I'm picking Pronger. After thinking it over, I've decided that I'm still really fucking pissed off at him. The Oilers were my team from when the Jets left until the Wild came, and I do not like seeing them get screwed by a smug asshole with loose elbows among other things. He even looks like an asshole. Like one of those news casters that couldn't come up with a thought not on a tellepromter if their damn lives depended on it. I want to scratch his name off the Stanley Cup.

It occurs to me that I'm bitching about this on a Ducks site. I think I'll just leave it at that...sorry, Earl.

Earl Sleek said...

It occurs to me that I'm bitching about this on a Ducks site. I think I'll just leave it at that...sorry, Earl.

No worries. 2/3 of what this blog concept is about is heavily into hating Pronger.