Takes and trash talk from both ALL sides of the NHL's most obscure PATHETIC* rivalry

* Thanks, Kevin Lowe!

Thursday, June 12, 2008

The NHL, Boring? No Way!

-Did anyone else think it was weird that they had a "NHL Young Guns" feature during tonight's hilarious NHL Awards ceremony and of the 3 California teams they showed... Corey Perry. Really? Perry? Not Getzlaf, who is the same age and way better? Not Kopitar, Brown, O'Sullivan? Hell, not even Milan Michalek? Seems weird to me. Oh, I'm sorry, you were busy showing 10 clips of Carey Price and not even one of Jonathan Toews or Patrick Kane, I'll shut up now. (Did they? I didn't think I saw one.)

-You have to think that Gary Bettman was hoping at least one English-speaking player won an award. Thank God for Vinny Lecavalier.

-When did Adam Graves turn into fucking Edward Scissorhands? I thought he was going to turn Cammi Granato's hair into a lawn figure.

-I knew chemo could make your hair fall out but I had no idea it could turn you into a mole. Hey Jason, it's called the Sun; you should hang out.

-Holy fuck are these the worst award ceremonies ever. I love hockey, and I love making fun of people, but I don't think I can get through this. They should have livened things up a bit by hitting Red Kelly in the face with a pie while screaming, "T-t-today, Junior!" Fuck this, I'm watching Monk. Look, he's afraid to touch things! Oh Monk, your zany ways make me feel better about my miserable life.


Earl Sleek said...

Is this a liveblog? And will Monk be included?

Well, I haven't seen a lick of this telecast, but it's on my DVR if I'm looking for boredom later, I guess.

Hmm, my workplace is pretty boring too. So at least it's not just hockey awards, I guess.

RudyKelly said...

It would've been but then I got bored. I'm not very professional.

Gray said...

It was unbelievably boring until I nearly chucked something at my tv when Brodeur won. I guess I should thank the NHL for 5 seconds of excitement in the form of anger.

Mina said...

Way to showcase the diversity of teams you have NHL. Not only were all the winners from teams east of the Mississippi, but when they asked the kid in the Sharks jersey what team he wanted to play for, he said Montreal.

Congrats on blowing an oppertunity to show non-fans what is great about the league. It's almost as if Bettman and CBC want hockey to fail in the US.

Nut said...

What are you talking about? Didn't you see Pavel Datsyuk's acceptance speech? Talk about entertainment!

Nut said...

is it just me or does jason blake look like that bird that hangs out with Snoopy all the time?

Mina said...

Datsyuk was entertaining, but there was so much filler. Seriously, they crammed the last 3 awards into 5 min of show time. For a broadcast that was an hour and a half.

Alexander Dubcek said...

I think there were three awards that didn't go to someone from Detroit or Washington: Vezina, Masterton and whatever the one Lecavalier won is called. It's like the 1998 finals all over again!

Earl Sleek said...

Yeah, I made a quick tally of nominees during yesterday's Fanhouse chat with Mirtle by division.

Central - 7 nominees
Atlantic - 5 nominees
Northeast - 4 nominees
Southeast - 4 nominees
Northwest - 3 nominees
Pacific - Nabokov

Hell, Nabokov and two Flames were the only nominees west of Chicago/Detroit.

If I didn't hate individual trophies so much (all they do is raise future salary -- I'd rather have the performance than the actual accolade), I'd be pissed.

Anonymous said...

I'm not saying there isn't east coast bias, but last year when the Ducks won the Cup they had three nominees. None of them won individual awards but they still got the Cup so it was all good.

Earl Sleek said...

Hell, Nabokov and two Flames were the only nominees west of Chicago/Detroit.

Whoops, forgot to mention Fernando Pisani. Still, that was only a nomination for the Pity-Your-Disease Trophy.

I'm not saying there isn't east coast bias

That's good, because if you did say that, I'd probably have stopped reading right there.

brokeyard said...

You guys should blog your own winners of the awards and use only Californian teams or Pacific Division teams.