Takes and trash talk from both ALL sides of the NHL's most obscure PATHETIC* rivalry

* Thanks, Kevin Lowe!

Thursday, November 20, 2008

What's eating the Dallas Stars?

The Dallas Stars are stumbling worse than a fat chick after 15 tequila shots. Seriously, tonight's loss to the Chicago Blackhawks (6-3) was ugly. The lowlight was Kris Versteeg's goal on Turco, in which the Stars made the talented rookie look like the second coming of ... well, Jonathan Toews.

(My internet connection has been Turco-like in its consistency, but I'll keep an eye out for Versteeg's goal. Link it in the comments/edit this post if you find it before me.)

It's easy to blame everything on Turco, but it's obvious that this isn't all his fault. Honestly, it's really hard to pin the tail on this blame donkey.* Could it be that, after being unappreciated and hard working for all these years, the Stars relaxed once it started to believe its press clippings? Did Turco morph into Dan Cloutier? Can they find a way to blame Sean Avery?

* - Ever wondered what it looks like to die in print? Wonder no longer ...


ANYWAY, it's getting harder and harder to stick to the "don't panic, it's still early" plan. Really, at this point the Stars can only hope for a dreary #8 seed and an absolute shellacking by the Red Wings or Sharks. The Pacific Division is off in the distance and the NHL doesn't use Mario Kart's "don't make loser kids sad, let them inexplicably go from 12th to 1st place" logic so they might as well kiss that goodbye.

How fucked is this team? Is it time to admit that the Stars just need to cut their losses and get into the Tavares sweepstakes? Do they even have their first round draft pick this year???


What a disaster. So, what now?

15 comments:

RudyKelly said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Earl Sleek said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Seconded.

Jason said...

Modano getting shipped at the deadline to a young team that needs a veteran presence?

Could happen.

Blue shell gooooooo!

Jason said...

This is "Mr. Plank" by the way- logged into the wrong gmail account. Not that I really added too much to the conversation.

brokeyard said...

So, what now?

NHL 09 to save the day again:

The Stars in my Dynasty made Tobias Stephan their starting goalie and he got them back to the Conference Championships

Anonymous said...

I dunno. Hypnosis to make them play better?

RudyKelly said...

The Stars got by last year on suprisingly good play by their rookie defenders but it doesn't look like that's working out this year. Do you guys miss Matty a little bit?

jamestobrien said...

Perhaps every single rookie defender's having a sophomore slump? Last year's looking more and more smoke & mirrors to me at this point.

Is it me, or does that sad hippie child have unusually large hands? I'll go back in my cage.

OH and here's WAY too many highlights of the game. Sure the Versteeg goal is in there somewhere (yes I'm lazy):

http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?rn=207187&cl=10769587&ch=240479&src=sports

Earl Sleek said...

Perhaps every single rookie defender's having a sophomore slump? Last year's looking more and more smoke & mirrors to me at this point.

I'll say this; one thing that has really helped me this season in not panicking early about the Ducks is the play of the Dallas Stars (and to some extent, the bulk of the western conference). Sure, the Ducks might be wildly inconsistent and disappear for large portions of games, but:

a) it's still November
b) not many teams seem to be doing that much better
c) it definitely could be worse

So I dunno, I guess that's one thing a Stars fan could latch onto also. Things are tough, but other than the Sharks & Wings, most everyone else is still in reach (and frankly, even if the team was doing great it would probably still trail those two western powerhouses).

kevin said...

The Dallas Morning News ran an article last week or so about how this might be the first year since the Stars came to town ('93) that none of our local major sports teams make the playoffs.

Rangers aren't relevant, but the Mavs might finally be turning it around, and Cowboys got Romo back. The Stars are still floundering.

And no game makes me curse out loud as much as Mario Kart. I have to be very careful when I'm playing with my 7yr-old nephew.

cristobal said...

A long way from the Brunnstrom for Rookie of the Year chat...
Things will get worse for Dallas as they traded a big part of the team in Boucher. Stupid move Hull. If they want to make some moves, as an LA fan, I think we could use Zubov for a playoff run. I'd love to see Doughty coming on after Zubov instead of Preissing following Doughty.

So does Dallas own their No. 1 in '09? Do the Kings own it?

Mike in OC said...

And no game makes me curse out loud as much as Mario Kart. I have to be very careful when I'm playing with my 7yr-old nephew.

I can totally relate. I have a 7 and 9 year old, and the 7 year old hits me with that blue shell on the last lap (he would carry it the whole race in most cases), and the 9 year old gets first. Took me awhile to realize what they were doing. Gotta love it though.

I thought the trade for Richards was bad. Richards is good dont get me wrong, but I really liked the guys they traded for him.

BTW, as bad as it might be for Dallas, they still own our (the Ducks) asses.

Earl Sleek said...

What a disaster. So, what now?

Well, this news probably isn't going to help the Stars very much, that's for sure.

kevin said...

Well, this news probably isn't going to help the Stars very much, that's for sure.

I hate to see anyone get hurt like that, especially a stand-up guy like Morrow. But I haven't been to a Ducks victory in Dallas since Selanne's hattrick game in Jan '07, and I've got tickets for this Saturday.

The way they're playing already, I think the Stars are toast in that game and the season without him.

Earl Sleek said...

The way they're playing already, I think the Stars are toast in that game and the season without him.

Sadly, the way the Ducks have been playing (especially against the Stars), I trust the latter part of that statement than I trust the part about tomorrow night.

Still, positivity! Best of luck tomorrow -- maybe this time you'll get a B. Ryan hat trick!