Takes and trash talk from both ALL sides of the NHL's most obscure PATHETIC* rivalry

* Thanks, Kevin Lowe!

Monday, November 10, 2008

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I was talking to my brother yesterday and we were in agreement that if the Kings could somehow combine Erik Ersberg and Jason Labarbera, they'd have the perfect goaltender (basically, Roberto Luongo). We then decided that if they somehow grew a child in a lab from their genes, he'd grow up to be:


...the dude from Idle Hands and She's All That. (He was also Fulton from Mighty Ducks.) I have a gift for placing faces, what can I say.

My brother also has a similar gift (and a similarly small penis) and pointed out that Edmonton's new goaltender looks exactly like Evgeni Malkin:


Also, and this is completely unrelated, but what the hell is Twilight? I went and saw Role Models this weekend and they had a trailer for this emo vampire movie; I sat there with a confused expression on my face for about 30 seconds and then muttered, "What the fuck is this shit?" Teenagers are retarded.

14 comments:

Anonymous said...

But if Ivanans was a vampire too that would be totally sweet

brokeyard said...

All these horror movies seem stupid.

The Haunting of Molly... something...

The Uninvited

The Unborn

They all looks so terrible

Mr. Plank said...

Throw another horror movie in there- The Los Angeles Kings. I kid, I kid.

Earl Sleek said...

That Malkin-looking goalie is ridiculous. You should have just posted that and claimed "I am the best photoshopper ever!" and I totally would have bought it.

Mike in OC said...

sorry, I was going to email RK or Earl this but oh well.

Unrelated: They know people hate the rinkside view, but they are not willing to change it becuase the rating are not down.

http://ducks.freedomblogging.com/2008/11/10/upon-further-review-rinkside-not-going-away/2452/

ho hum!

jamestobrien said...

Holy Crap, Rudy, you're not kidding. He even has that weird semi-pout.

How was "Role Models" btw? Trying to decide to see that or Zack and Miri next time I go to the ol box office.

RudyKelly said...

It was amazing, but I think I liked it so much purely because I have a man crush on Paul Rudd and Sean William Scott is exactly like one of my roommates. A lot of people saying weird shit and then Paul Rudd making a confused expression. I haven't seen Zack and Miri because I don't believe in pornography.

“I’m going to get killed for this,” said Feuer, “but if these people truly don’t like ‘Rinkside View,’ then don’t watch."

Fuck you, you horse's ass. That's like telling a junkie, "Hey, if you don't like using a dirty needle then don't shoot up." I'm still going to use the needle, but maybe you could stop being a dick and clean it up a little. You know why Rinkside View gets better ratings? Because you only use it against marquee teams. Don't get mad at the fans because your little baby sucks more dick than Patrick O'Neal and you're probably going to get fired.

Earl Sleek said...

Unrelated: They know people hate the rinkside view, but they are not willing to change it because the ratings are not down.

Idiots. Seriously, it's not like this is Canada. Piss off enough fans and there aren't lines of people waiting to replace them.

Nut said...

That guy from Idle Hands makes me glad I went through puberty late rather than early. Its much better methinks to see people I haven't seen since I was a kid and have them say, "wow, look how much you've grown!" rather than "wow, you were way bigger than everybody else your age in Mighty Ducks but now your short and fat, and if that wasn't enough, your hair turned red!"

Sarah said...

Good call on the Malkin resemblance. I was too distracted by his awesome name to notice his face.

Oh, and I loved Idle Hands. I may be the only one.

jamestobrien said...

Really, though, who DOESN'T have a crush/man crush on Paul Rudd. Find me that person and you'll find a soulless human being.

RudyKelly said...

Which is ironic because I think Paul Rudd is a soulless human being.

Louis Ames said...

I'd like to quote Rudy...

"sucks more dick than Patrick O'Neal"

I couldn't have said it better...

Bravo!

brokeyard said...

Okay:

I think the reason ratings are up with Rinkside View is they cater to casual fans and channel flippers. Despite Rudy saying "it assumes the most important man is the man with the puck", the casual fan/channel flipper only really cares about the puck rather than the play developing.

It gives me an "NFL on TV" feeling where they'll show a running back finding a gap through lineman from that overhead camera while the announcer draws a line through the gap as well to help people who couldn't tell that's where he went. The overhead views and such just have the same essence, in my opinion.