Takes and trash talk from both ALL sides of the NHL's most obscure PATHETIC* rivalry

* Thanks, Kevin Lowe!

Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Your Monthly Reminder that Raitis Ivanans is Big

Kimbo Slice, shitty fighter and popular "mixed martial artist," is listed as 6'2", 240 lbs.

John Cena, professional wrestler and closeted homosexual, is listed as 6'1", 250 lbs.

Raitis Ivanans, the Latvian Liquidator, is listed as 6'3", 263 lbs.

Lady and gentlemen, Raitis Ivanans is big.

5 comments:

Kelpfreak said...

Slice vs. Ivanans on the ice at Staples and I just might shell out the $39.99. Hell, for that, I might even watch CBS.

James Mirtle said...

Make Slice wear skates, too.

Earl Sleek said...

I'm so lame. I don't even know who the first person is. Was the second person in The Marine? Never saw it.

But the Latvian Liquidator, now that's a household name.

Kent W. said...

I think some team should collect Ivanans, Derek Boogaard and Boris Valabik and stick them all on the 4th line (I know, Valabik is a defenseman). Course, they'd probably get scored on every time they stepped on the ice, but they'd sure look scary while it happened!

Doogie2K said...

John Cena, professional wrestler and closeted homosexual

I think you forgot "horrishitty rapper" there.