Takes and trash talk from both ALL sides of the NHL's most obscure PATHETIC* rivalry

* Thanks, Kevin Lowe!

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Kings Gameday: Is The Season Over Yet?

LA Kings (pbbbbttt!!!) @ Phoenix (36-33-5, 11th in West)

7:00 PST, FSN Prime Ticket


You said it, pal.

Well, this season's basically over. Jack Johnson broke his foot and is out for the rest of the season. (Lousy Marleau, I'll kill you!) I'm not sure if the Kings are going to call any one up from Manchester that will actually play (both Joe Piskula and Richard Petiot are hurt right now), so I guess Jon Klemm will move back to defense and... fuck... Brian Willsie will dress. Just to give you an idea of what our lines will be like:

O'Sullivan-Kopitar-Brown
Frolov-Armstrong-Cammalleri
Ivanans-Handzus-Ellis
Calder-Giuliano-Willsie

Visnovsky-Preissing
Blake-Harrold
Dallman-Klemm

Erik Ersberg
Dan Cloutier

Jesus. When I do my off-season preview, 5 of these guys will not be on my hopeful team. Maybe 6. In the meantime, here's A Handy Guide for Beginners: Dealing With Another Lost Season by Kevin Schultz, AKA the guy from Barry Melrose Rocks. I prefer steps #1 and #2, with a heavy dose of #6. You can't do #6, though; I don't need the competition.

***

Pop quiz, hot shot. You're the Kings coach. There is 1:40 left in the game. Your team is down, 2-1, but has had fairly constant pressure on the Sharks goaltender for the last 5 minutes. Your top line of Brown-Kopitar-O'Sullivan has been on the ice for the last minute and they're looking to change. You have 3 options:

1) Keep them out there. They're your top line and the game's almost over.

2) Put Frolov-Armstrong-Cammy out on the ice. They've been your best line all night.

3) Put Ivanans-Handzus-Frolov out there. ????????????????????????????????????????????

What do you do? WHAT do you do???

(If you said #3, congratulations! You're an idiot/Marc Crawford!)

Prediction: Kings lose, 5-2. Goals by Frolov and Cammalleri. Lousy bums.

8 comments:

chris in torrance said...

I didn't get any of the decisions Marc Crawford made for this entire game, not just the line that finished it. Starting Dan Cloutier??? What the hell is that?! Nobody at home wants to see that sack of shit especially after he just badmouthed everyone! Then, he started Ivanans, Handzus and Ellis. What the hell is the matter with him??!!

I'm guessing the 5 guys that will not be on your hopeful team are Cloutier, Klemm, Dallman, Willsie, and Armstrong. I disagree with Armstrong, but I know you hate him.

RudyKelly said...

Close. I have Armstrong on the team in a 4th line capacity. I think Giuliano is gone, since he and Ellis are basically the same but Ellis is slightly better in every way.

Julian said...
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chris in torrance said...

I have tried not to get too down on Crawford so far because he doesn't have a team in place yet that he can win with. The San Jose game was the first time I blamed him and thought he was a moron.

A friend of mine recommended Tony Granato as head coach. Any opinions on that option?

RudyKelly said...

Crawford definitely deserves credit for Dustin Brown, Jack Johnson and Patrick O'Sullivan, but he always tries to go for the "genius" move (like putting Ivanans out there) that makes him look insane.

I don't think Granato is a very well-regarded coach. Colorado had him and dumped him for Joel Quenneville right when he came available. I love Tony Granato but I can't see him being a legitimate option.

heed said...

making a dog smoke is one thing. but coors light, you trying to make him into a sissy.

heed said...
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Earl Sleek said...

I'm pretty swamped today, but if anyone's interested, I did a PuckToon for the first time in three weeks.

Surprise, surprise, the topic is Pronger.