NHL offers new support hotline

New York (AP) - Have you been unjustly fired from your job?

Have you done everything asked or expected of you, and without warning been given the ol' pink slip?

Have you found yourself suddenly replaced by an underling or even replaced by your boss himself, as if you were not even a necessary contributor in a corporate system?

Sometimes life throws you a tough break like that; it can be demeaning and discouraging, and often there is nowhere to direct your resulting anger: "Why? What did I do wrong? Am I just not good enough?"

The NHL, ever sympathetic to its money-spending fans, has decided to respond with its new Canned! Hotline.

For a small fee, you can listen to real people who can tell even worse stories about workplace injustice. People who excelled in their position but found themselves suddenly exiled. People who were fired after only 40 days, never having a chance to prove themselves.

Your problems will feel slight in comparison, and you'll be much more adjusted to your crappy unemployment situation.

Call now!

(Note: For a slightly larger fee, they will also listen to your sob story.)